The Best Way to Spread Christmas Cheer....

December is finally here and Christmas magic is in the air! Downtown is sparkling with colorful lights and candy canes. It truly is the most wonderful time of the year. One of the best things about the Holiday Season is it ignites an inspiration to Do Good. Random acts of kindness, giving and donations, Toys for Tots and Angel Trees. I think it’s safe to say that this year, more than ever, we could all be encouraged by a random act of kindness. So I put together some ideas for how we can all spread a little Holiday Cheer in our daily lives.

• Hand out $5 gift cards at the Post Office

  I was recently a victim of the ever-long USPS line. Although we know it is always exceptionally busy this time of year, most people still seem surprised when they walk in and see the line. I was having a pretty leisure day and didn’t have anywhere to be, so it didn’t bother me that much. But I tried to empathize with the others in line and what they might be dealing with in their days. It occurred to me that the Post Office was the perfect place to spread some Christmas Cheer and lift a few spirits.

• Stock your car with a few “goodie bags” for the homeless

  Often times I am asked for food rather than money, and when that’s the case I am always inclined to help. Having little bags of snacks on hand means I’m always prepared to help someone when they need it.

• Pay for the guest behind you in the Starbucks line

  This one’s a classic, but the warm fuzzy feeling I get when someone randomly buys my coffee never gets old.

• Help an elderly person load their groceries

  And take their cart back for them.

• Buy a couple of drinks

  Next time you are dining out, keep your eye out for a couple enjoying date night. Observe what they’re drinking and anonymously add their drinks to your tab. It’s the little, unexpected things that make an impact on someone’s spirit.

• Help Someone with their holiday purchase

  Have an extra $20 to spare? Buy a Target gift card and find someone in the store to give it to. You can make someone’s day by helping with their Christmas shopping!

No matter where you are this holiday season, keep your eyes open for ways to help others. Opportunities to Do Good are always around the corner if we look hard enough. ❤️

Market Square, Downtown Knoxville, TN

Live And Love, Every Second.

Sometimes if I’m not careful I can get lost in my fear. The terrifying reality that anything can happen at any time to destroy the people I love.  A heart attack, a car accident, being in the wrong place at the wrong time when an angry soul decides to take their rage out on the world around them. Any moment could be your last. And as much as we hate to admit it, we truly have no control.

The reality sets in that we only get today. Our one chance. Every minute we spend here is a gift, a gift that could be taken away at any single moment. Let that sink in today. Life is fragile. Don’t waste a minute of it holding back. Tell the people you love that you love them. Quiet the noise around you. Will it matter tomorrow? Let go of the regrets and the things that weigh heavy on you. Take the risks. Love hard and let go of the rest. What would you do if this was your last day to be alive? We should ask ourselves that question every morning. Don’t leave the words unspoken or a moment of your life unlived. Live and love every second, because every second could be your last. 

5 Steps To Get Your Life Together

Recently I’ve been feeling stuck. I have a million things I want to be doing, but can’t seem to find the motivation no matter how much I want to. I find myself feeling lethargic and wasting most of the free time I have, when I could be getting a lot more done. I was speaking with a friend a few days ago, who confided that he has also been feeling this way. He has plenty of ambition and drive to do more, but day after day he continues to feel unmotivated to make the necessary moves to accomplish his goals. I assured him he wasn’t alone, and the truth is I feel this more than I can express.

2020 has been about survival. There is a mental and emotional exhaustion that I can’t shake, compiled with constant worry and anxiety. The lack of motivation causes unproductivity, which in turn causes me to feel guilty and even more unmotivated. I asked my friend the question I have asked myself time and time again. “What are you wasting time doing every day that might be holding you back?” And “what kinds of things should you be doing instead that will actually move you forward?”

Although this seems very simple, making the changes are easier said than done. When I spend 85% of my time giving my all to a demanding job, all I want to do at the end of the day is disconnect. To distract myself with mindless entertainment. To relax and not think about anything. But I can also see that day after day, this is keeping me from moving forward. One thing I know to be true is that you have to start small. My dad always says if you can do without something for just two weeks you will no longer need it. In the same way, if you do something consistently for two weeks it becomes a natural part of your life. Here are a few small steps that I believe can make a huge difference in the long run.

1. Get up earlier. Trust me, if anyone struggles with this it’s me. But I also understand the impact it can make to add an extra hour or two to your day. One of the founders of the hotel company I work for said if you want to be successful in the face of adversity you have to “get up a little earlier and work a little harder.” Little by little, try getting up earlier each day so that you have the time you need to start your day the way you want to and be more and more productive.

2. Go to bed earlier. Every one of us has 24 hours in the day and although some of us can function on less sleep than others, getting enough sleep still remains one of the most important things when it comes to our well-being. We know that lack of sleep can affect countless elements of our lives- mood and mental health, productivity, physical health and immune function, etc. Meaning, if we want to start our day earlier, we need to start turning in earlier as well.

3. Get back to your roots. Introduce or reintroduce something into your daily life that brings you back to the core of who you are. Something that centers you. For me, it’s daily prayer and Bible study. For some it may be meditation, yoga, playing music, or poetry. Make more time for the thing or things that make you feel most like you.

4. Take a break from time wasters. Give up the useless activities you are hiding behind. For me, it’s currently Netflix. I lose myself in the show I’m watching and before I know it I have wasted hours that could have been spent on other things. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with watching a little TV. But if it’s causing you to be stuck where you are instead of moving forward due to too much wasted time, you may want to think about cutting back. This could also be video games, social media, etc. Try cutting this out of your day for a week or two and see how much you can accomplish.

5. Introduce a healthy habit. Give up sugar, soda, or drinking. You don’t have to reinvent your entire diet overnight, but one small change can make a big difference over time. Add 20 minutes of activity into your day- walking, biking, yoga, jump rope, HIIT training, etc. Choose one thing to omit or add to your day and see how it affects you after a couple of weeks. One healthy habit leads to another, and before you know it you are well on the path to a healthier lifestyle.

Again, I know some of these may seem obvious. But how many of us have actually put them into practice? I find it’s sometimes the simplest things that can make the biggest difference, when practiced consistently. And remember, this year has smacked us all around a little bit. Change the things that you can, but don’t forget to give yourself grace and be patient in the process.

Learning To Let Go

A few nights ago, I left work around 3am and stopped by the nearby pharmacy on the way home. I had a prescription refill ready and I needed it right away. I approached the Pickup counter and waited to be helped by one of the two associates working behind the counter. There was a Pharmacist who was busy counting pills and refilling prescriptions, and another associate who was restocking some of the medicines on the shelf. I wanted for a minute, thinking surely someone would greet me any second now. When no one acknowledged me for a hot minute, I placed my keys on the counter to gently make my presence known.  After another good pause, the associate who was stocking looked over and asked, “Is there something I can help you with?” Y’all, I was straight up baffled by this question and I know I didn’t hide it very well in the tone of my voice when I said, “Um yeah, I need to pick up a prescription.” Obviously. Like, literally what else would I be standing in the pickup line for? Not only did she not stop what she was doing to help me, but the Pharmacist eventually had to stop what she was doing as the other associate told me she would be with me in a minute and simply went back to working on stocking. Undoubtedly terrible customer service. I finished out my transaction with the Pharmacist and left the store thinking of all the smart comments I could/should have said to the store associate. I was utterly annoyed and felt like I didn’t do enough to let her know how terribly rude she was acting.

We all experience situations like this, right? When someone “does us wrong” and we don’t really respond at the time, but then later can’t stop thinking about all the things we should have said to really stick it to them. I won’t deny that I have found myself to be a little hot blooded at times, letting things get to me more than I should. It genuinely gets to me when people are rude or indecent, and don’t even get me started with bad drivers. It’s times like these I think about what my father would do. I have been surprised countless times by the way he reacts to frustrating situations. I can be hot as all get out (that’s southern for “mad as hell”) in the passenger’s seat, blood boiling about the car in front of us going 30 mph when the speed limit is 45, and my dad’s response is simply, “we’ll get there eventually.” Or “there’s nothing we can do about it, so don’t let it bother you.” I have seen him handle some of the most frustrating situations with a shrug of the shoulders, not getting upset because he knows it’s not about him. I’m sure he hasn’t always been this way, but he has learned to live by this attitude. And with some practice, I’m learning as well.

What would I have actually gained by making a rude comment to the woman at the pharmacy counter? Would it have made me feel better? Maybe, temporarily, but not for a good reason. Perhaps I can shift my mindset and know that I don’t need to have the last word to feel better. Would she have felt ashamed for her lack of customer service? Most likely, no as she clearly wasn’t all that concerned with her performance. Could I have possibly gotten her in trouble with her boss? Maybe, but that’s not what I wanted my accomplishment to be that day.

How much happier can we be if we just learn to let things go? By practicing this mindset, we are not only refusing to contribute to the excessive and unnecessary hostility in the world around us, but also benefitting ourselves and our own mental well-being. Brush it off. Let it go. Will it matter a week from now? A year from now? Forget about it. Remember, the way others behave is rarely ever about you. We can be much happier and more free when we don’t let every little thing affect us. Learn to let the small things go and live a little lighter.

Live The Life You Were Meant For

I have been thinking a lot about purpose lately. Do you feel like you’re living the life you were made for? I feel like so many people just kind of float around in the world, letting life happen to them, and settling for mediocre happiness. But that has never been enough for me. I have always had a powerful desire to live a passionate and meaningful life.

I believe at some point in our lives we come to a place where we have to choose between a comfortable and average life or a risky and extraordinary one. And it’s likely the path that scares us most that holds the most reward.

I was recently introduced to Susie Moore while listening to the Whiskey & Work podcast. Susie is a life coach and columnist and I have to say, the knowledge she threw in this podcast was life-changing for me. She has such a free way of thinking and a total “why not?” attitude. A woman after my own heart! She talks a lot about how most of us are so hesitant to go after the things that are calling us for fear of “what if it doesn’t work out?” When the reality is- if we don’t go for, how will we ever know? She also says if you feel called to do something, then you have an obligation to go after it.

My whole life I have felt called to something bigger than myself. And I don’t know exactly what that looks like for me, but I feel like the plan is there if I just keep listening to that voice that tells me what the next step is. I know that sounds easier said than done, but the truth is some of us can’t hear that voice because we have silenced it with our fear. We may know in our hearts that anything is possible, but we have our minds closed off to anything that seems out of reach or uncomfortable. We are crippled by the fear of failure.

But what would happen if we just went for it? Some of the most successful people failed multiple times before they ever succeeded. Failure is inevitable and something we should get comfortable with because if we don’t open ourselves up to the possibility of failure, we will never get far enough to reach success. I love the way Susie Moore said it- “failure and success are the same road, success is just further along.” Let that sink in.

I believe if you truly feel called to something, eventually success is guaranteed. Think about it, why would you feel called to something that wasn’t meant to be for you? We get a short amount of time on this planet and I don’t want to leave it without doing everything that is meant for me. It actually makes me sad to think about all the time we spend living a life that is less than the life we were meant for.

So what would you do if you stopped letting your fear hold you back? If you refused to keep doubting yourself or asking “what if?” Make a move! Don’t overthink it. Despite popular belief, it doesn’t have to be perfect. Anything is better than nothing, and over time you’ll get better.

Whatever that thing is for you, I hope you find the courage to go for it. Remember, if it’s meant for you, then it’s already yours!

Do Good, Be Good.

What do you spend most of your time doing? What in your life takes up the biggest part of your energy? Are you striving for success? Out there grinding every day to reach your next goal? How far would you go to get where you want to be? What do you plan to do when you get there?

I was once asked in a leadership class, “what is everyone’s main goal in life?” The obvious answer for the majority of the room was “to be happy.” In a sense, every single person is just searching for happiness. Doing the next thing they think they need to do to fulfill themselves and keep holding onto that happiness for another day.

But the truth is, happy is a fleeting emotion that will leave you exhausted by the chase. What if we concentrated on something more meaningful? Something with lasting effects. What if our goal wasn’t to be happy? What if our goal was to do good. To do good every day for those around us and for the world we live in, to make the right decisions and be kind and loving to everyone we meet. I believe that if this is both our short- and long-term goals, happiness is inevitable.

Happiness can’t be our end goal. You can be happy in any circumstance. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t believe you can feel happy all the time. Life is hard and sometimes grief gets the upper hand. In those times, we hold onto hope and trust that happiness is for a later day. But I believe that if we live our lives with a daily intention of loving others and putting good out into the world around us, the result is a lasting happiness that can’t be replaced with the superficial kind we tend to chase. The kind that can sustain us throughout even the tough times. The dream is to do good. Everything else is just extra joy!

“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”

P.S. If you are looking for a way to do some good, one of my favorite organizations is The Paul Walker Foundation. Head over to their site to read about some of the ways they are changing the world. And this shirt may or may not have been intended for a child, but either way it’s my new favorite tee shirt!

How to Pull Yourself Out of That Slump

Have you ever woken up on the wrong side of the bed and just couldn’t recover? I feel like it’s safe to say we all have those days. I don’t know about you, but sometimes I find myself down and depressed and simply unable to pinpoint a reason. No matter how many things in life I have to be grateful for, sometimes I find myself in a slump. I took some time to jot down a few things I recommend for pulling yourself back up when this kind of mood creeps up on you.

1. Get your nails done OR give yourself an @home mani/pedi

Girls, you know there is just something about a fresh manicure that makes you feel like a new woman. I usually go the DIY route myself as I have such a hard time paying for this kind of thing, but a few times a year I do splurge and go see a pro. Sometimes it really is the little things like a new set of paint that can lift our spirits.

2. Turn on a 90’s boy band playlist and DANCE alone in your bedroom

I am not even joking a little bit. It’s’ actually surprising how much the nostalgia of an old Backstreet Boys song combined with the freedom you feel when you let loose like no one’s watching makes you feel. Maybe you’re more of a NKOTB girl, or even something a little more old-school. A little Motown playlist never left anyone in a bad mood. 10/10 recommend when you’re feeling grumpy.

3. Relax in a hot bubble bath

This one is obvious, but highly effective. Run a bath with your favorite scented bubble bath or essential oils, light a soothing candle, throw in a glass of wine if you please, and simply do nothing.

4. Spend some time with your favorite magazine

Hear me out. Pick up a copy of a magazine you love- for me it’s Magnolia Journal. Find a cozy spot like the rocking chair on the front porch, or the big comfy chair in the living room, or even a cozy coffee shop. And just take an hour to sip on your favorite beverage while you flip through the pages. I know the world around us is constantly screaming the opposite, but it’s okay to be totally unproductive for one hour. Sometimes it’s simply necessary.

5. Sweat

However you want to do it, get your body moving enough to increase your heart rate and work up a sweat. We all know that exercise releases endorphins into your body, which create a more positive state of mind. So find something you enjoy, whether it’s dancing, walking, jogging, biking, etc., and do it for at least 20-30 minutes to relieve some stress and decompress.

6. Go for a drive to nowhere

This one is my personal favorite. Turn on your favorite playlist, fill up the car, and just drive. No deadlines or directions, just you and the open road. I could do this all day if the music is right, and I have many times. Sometimes a good long drive can bring you back to life.

7. Practice Gratitude

It may seem kind of obvious, but the truth is gratitude isn’t always natural for us. It’s so easy to get lost in the things we think we are lacking and forget how much we really do have. Once in a while, especially when you are feeling a little low, I encourage you to take some time to meditate on the things you are most grateful for.

This could be as simple as the health of your family, a happy relationship, or a stable job that you enjoy. Or you can really dig deep into the moments in your life that have truly felt like miracles. When you were running late for work and got stuck waiting on a train, only to find that because of the train delay you probably avoided being involved in a major traffic accident. Or when you were sure you might lose a loved one, and for some reason, unexplainable by science, they pulled through when all hope seemed lost. These examples seem specific because they are true stories. And I bet if we all dug deep enough, we could find examples of our own. Sometimes we have to look beyond the obvious things to find true gratitude.

Lastly, I would like to add that if your slump lasts more than a week or two, you may want to evaluate what’s going on in your life as there is likely something deeper that needs to be addressed at the root. It could be something medical making you feel this way, or perhaps your spirit is trying to tell you there is something in your life that needs to change. And don’t be afraid to reach out to someone as sometimes we need an objective point of view to help us see things for what they are.

I hope this is helpful, and I hope you take some time to treat yourself today and do something that lifts your spirits and brings you joy! 

It's 2020, Anything Goes..

I find myself saying this at least twice a day these days and I think I’ll officially adopt it as my mantra for the rest of the year. At a time when staying in your pajamas all week is the norm, drinking wine at noon is socially acceptable, and grocery store runs require personal protective gear, at this point we are all just doing whatever we can to get through each day with most of our sanity.

I am finding the best thing I can do during this time is concentrate on gratitude. I am lucky and thankful to still be working full time at a job I love. I know this is not the case for so many and my heart goes out to those who have been truly affected. I am grateful for the assistance the government has offered and sleep a lot better knowing my employees can pay a few more bills this month. I am enormously grateful for the health of my family and can’t wait to hug them all when this is all over with. And I’m grateful to know that while every day feels like a hundred years right now, this too will pass and will one day be just a memory.

Like everyone else I suppose, my life looks a lot different these days. I have had to completely rework my routine, and just when I was really beginning to master the old routine. Isn’t that how life works though? And as a natural “fly by the seat of my pants” kinda girl, sticking with a routine in general is challenging enough. But I have accepted the challenge and am determined to make these changes work for me and not against me. There are a few things I am doing regularly and very intentionally to make sure my health, both physical and mental, are cared for during this crazy time.

1. Stick to a healthy eating plan and drink lots and lots of water. When we eat bad, we feel bad, and none of us need any extra reason to feel bad right now. That’s not to say I don’t cheat (I had Five Guys delivered twice this week) but I am making an intentional effort to make sure I am giving my body what it needs so that I can think clearly and perform at my best.

2. Get some things accomplished and try something new! What better time than now to, say, start a blog?? Or clean out your closet or learn an instrument or read a couple books on your 2020 reading list? Do something creative and stimulate your mind. If we use our time right, being forced to stay at home for a few weeks can actually serve us well.

3. Facetime the ones you love. Now, more than ever, make sure you are reaching out to your loved ones. I know, I know, the world isn’t really ending. But it is a good reminder to take the time to love your people, even from a distance.

4. Be intentionally grateful. I know a lot of people who take time each day to meditate on what they have to be grateful for, and I have to say they’re onto something. It isn’t always a natural feeling throughout the day. We often have to remind ourselves how much we truly do have to be thankful for. Focus on the good, on purpose.

Social distancing at the lake

I know you might be struggling figure out your “new normal.” Just know that every single other human around is struggling just the same, regardless of how easy it may look for someone else. We are all just trying to navigate these strange unchartered waters and hope the sun comes up soon.

I hope you have a beautiful week and make the most of whatever situation you are in right now!